Love is unselfish and focuses on pursuing the best for others, but organizations spend billions of dollars promoting self-esteem and self-love. So, you see the results daily in our news. It increases hostility toward each other and works against what is good for society.
If you accept God’s Word, it is clear that all people are born with a sin nature which in turn focuses on "flashing our ME" rather than helping others. Research shows a clear correlation of hostility and high self-esteem. Thus, the reason you most often find criminals with high self-esteem. When you pursue your own best, it too often contradicts what other people see as their best, therefore, hostility is likely.
Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own... – 1 Corinthians 4-5
Love Versus Selfishness
When you speak about love and selfishness, you are talking about opposites, even enemies. They easily represent God and Satan. God is love and Satan is selfishness. Satan is all about pride, self-absorption, and flashing his ME. Satan continually seeks his own way, has high self-esteem.
On the other hand, love never seeks to hurt or neglect others. It strives for others’ best, satisfaction, and advantage. It seeks their highest good. And, the outstanding benefit is satisfaction and fulfillment.
Think about that. When you seek your own, you want satisfaction and fulfillment, but it is, at best, temporary, more likely, doesn’t happen. It is temporary, because self plugs into the world system, and who rules the world right now? Satan, but his rule is temporary.
But when you seek the best for others you are operate with an eternal perspective. That is where long term, even eternal satisfaction and fulfillment reside. When you seek the highest good of others, your reward is satisfaction that lasts.
Consider this scenario. You are selfish and self-absorbed. And, you want satisfaction. So, you indulge in your appetites, impulses and pleasures and you get some satisfaction. Since the fulfillment was based on something that is temporary by nature, it can only provide what its nature allows or is. Eating a piece of fruit provides temporary fulfillment, because it is temporary in its nature. Indulging in materialism, sex, drugs, and alcohol can only provide temporary satisfaction due to their physical temporal properties.
Worse yet, dependence on the temporary item easily escalates, because you want the satisfaction again. But, the object of the satisfaction is temporary by nature and invariably produces less rather than more satisfaction as you rely on it. You continue to escalate the reliance on it or allow your appetites, impulses and pleasures to drive you into something that promises more satisfaction than you are currently getting. But the satisfaction is built on a temporal foundation and it becomes a satisfaction Ponzi scheme that eventually collapses. You want satisfaction, but it is only temporary and ultimately fleeting.
Instead of seeking your own benefit, suppose you believe that love is unselfish and pursue the best for another person. And, what you did actually helps them. Or, suppose you believe love is unselfish and you do the same thing, but they don’t benefit. Is there is satisfaction in those situations?
Of course there is! Satisfaction is dependent on the object you trust to provide satisfaction. If you depend on the person acknowledging how much you helped them, you depend on a faulty source. And, you actually do not believe that love is unselfish. You believe that you should get something in return.
If though, you trust in God’s very nature, His perfection, and trustworthiness, you will be satisfied every time you do what He wants you to do. He is the living water, contrasted against the earthly water that satisfies for a while then satisfies less the more you drink – yet, always having to return because its ability to satisfy wears off.
When you learn to put all of your emotions and pleasure in doing what God asks, that is where true satisfaction is found. It is a satisfaction no longer dependent on life, circumstances, or people.
Pursue Obeying God
And, God may reward you further when people benefit from you serving them as you desire to please Him. Some people will thank you for your service, even though you weren’t seeking their thanks. That is just like God, blesses you when you were just doing what He wanted you to do. He will also provide you peace and joy even when others are displeased with you.
That is the Christian paradox. Lose your life, and you save it. Pass up selfish pleasures, and you get eternal rewards and satisfaction.
Let them do good, that they be rich in good works, ready to give, willing to share, storing up for themselves a good foundation for the time to come, that they may lay hold on eternal life. – I Timothy 6:18, 19
GR8 Relationships—Pursuing the BEST in work, in life, in love.
Right Thinking—Right Relationships—Right NOW!!