Freedom is External and Internal

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As simple as it sounds, freedom used correctly is a radically different way to live. Unless you accept the reality of freedom and choice, you will usually react to and be controlled by situations like a mouse to cheese. And, just as important, you forget that other people have choices too. When you forget or ignore their freedom, you will try to force or manipulate others to choose what you want.

For example, of course a wife does not want her husband making bad decisions! So, she thinks that complaining about each bad decision, multiple times, will cause him to do better. When he ignores or refuses to accept her input, she will get more forceful. Why? She wants to prevent mistakes he is making because those mistakes hurt her too. That is what makes sense to her – and most people!

But freedom helps her see choices instead of trying to control him. She could choose to offer her insight without complaining when he decides without her input, even if it is bad. Another option would be what God states in I Peter 3:1, choose to remain silent, a no words strategy! Unfortunately, we think that is a bad strategy, even though it is God’s Word.

Why are those other options not considered? FEAR! She makes life about herself – her ME starts flashing, driven by the possibility or probability of bad things happening. Control then seems to be the only good option, because otherwise, bad things will happen unless she steps in.

That is a common issue in relationships! But God asks us to relate to one another differently.


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