Approval Is Confused with Accepting Behavior | GR8 Relationships

Approval Is Confused with Accepting Behavior

Approval of behavior is often confused with accepting a person. And, that often ends up controlling you, because you look only at their behavior and forget about what it means to accept them.

Relationships suffer when you confuse acceptance with approval of the other person's behavior. Those are two separate elements. God’s example that was stated above shows us that acceptance and approval are not connected – praise God!

Approval of Others Is Confused with Accepting Their Behavior

For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:38-39

God Accepts Us

He accepts us when we believe in Jesus Christ His Son! He makes us new creatures, adopts us into His family, and guarantees us a place with Him in eternity! Nothing can separate us from His love.

For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:38-39

AND, we either please or displease Him with our behavior.

But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. – Hebrews 11:6

His displeasure with our bad behavior doesn’t change the fact that He accepts us as part of His family.

Isn’t that true of you and your parents? Bad behavior does not remove you from being the biological child of your parents.

God accepts us and our behavior doesn't change that. Our behavior is totally separate from His acceptance of us.

Oh NO, another Truth Table!! Watch the video.

Displeasure with Behavior Isn't Part of Acceptance

You too are free to accept others even when their behavior is not appropriate. It’s entirely your choice – totally separate from their qualifications, actions or thinking. You do not need to reject someone and remove them from your life, because of their behavior. But too often that happens.

You can have standards for accepting someone and standards for their behavior – that’s fine. And, you can accept someone, just because you want to! Acceptance is totally your choice – with or without standards.

Their behavior, on the other hand, is their decision, their choice. They choose what they do and that may please or displease you. In fact, you can be sad, angry, excited, or brought to tears with their behavior. God’s Word shows He has similar emotions to our good and bad behavior. BUT, But, He does not accept or reject us, because of those behaviors.

Accepting and approving are two separate issues.

Watch Out for the Emotions Trap!

As you experience emotions because of someone else’s choices, your emotions will start controlling you. Those emotions will be the link between accepting them and their behavior.

Without the Holy Spirit’s energy, you will not accept and love someone whose behavior is bad, even evil. And the opposite is true – your acceptance can be driven by your emotions, because they are behaving so well.

Neither is correct – acceptance is totally separate from their behavior. That is the ESSENCE of LOVE! And, that is exactly how God deals with us.