Feelings and actions can influence each other in both directions. In fact, actions and feelings are connected in both directions. That allows you to use some tools to help you first think about how to act, which can change your emotions. So, again, your feelings have a connection to your thinking and actions.

Since feelings are only indicators or responders, acting or thinking influences or drives your feelings. That means ready–fire–aim is a poor option. Acting before thinking is as bad as letting your emotions lead.

Researchers consistently find that people behaving in ways that conflict with their feelings will change their feelings to be more consistent with their behavior. That is why people who go through the trauma of having an arm or leg amputated are often asked to help others in the hospital as soon as they are able.

Order and Consistency

Order or consistency is essential for life and your body. Research shows that acting differently than your feelings impacts depression. Consider the following scripture that tells us that is true.

If you extend your soul to the hungry and satisfy the afflicted soul, then your light shall dawn in the darkness, and your darkness shall be as the noonday. – Isaiah 58:10 (NKJV)

When you serve others, your darkness turns to light when you no longer focus on yourself. God wants you to serve others, which models His behavior instead of “flashing our ME.” Actions and feelings are connected!

Face-Body-Breathe

Use a simple technique to experiment on yourself to see how actions alter feelings. Try it the next time you are feeling sad. Three steps – Face, Body, Breathe/Speak. Start with your face. Ask yourself, “How would I like to feel right now?” If you answer “sad,” then this three-step technique may not help, but if you answer “happy,” “joyful,” “peaceful,” or other similar words, then put a smile or at least a pleasant expression on your face. Even if you answer “sad,” try this experiment anyway.

Next, look at your body. Most likely, your body reflects sadness – slumped shoulders, head down, moving slowly. Change your body to be in a position that demonstrates the word you chose. At a minimum, sit or stand straight, with your shoulders back and chin up – good posture. Start moving with a little more energy.

Finally, think about your breathing and speech. Take some deep breaths and speak with energy and articulation if speaking is needed. You will soon see the critical element that makes this technique work. Again, actions and feelings are connected.

Now Your Body Is Out of Sync

If you do those three steps, you put your body out of sync with your emotions. So, your feelings are sad, but your body is “happy,” which leaves you in what researchers call dissonance – emotions and actions are not equal. You have two options: change your emotions to be like your body or change your body to be like your emotions. If you let your body remain “happy,” you can experience the reality of emotions being responders. They are responding to your actions and, more importantly, to your thinking, which drives your actions.

“But that is just being fake!” That could be the case, but if you decide happiness or joy is more important than depression or sadness, it is not fake – it is true to your values or priorities. Depression is not what you value, which is the actual “fake” item. This technique helps you to be authentic.

What the video to learn more about how actions and feelings are connected.