Control-oriented people, which can be anyone, are often “good but up to no good.” I could be the poster child for a control person. It created severe damage in all my relationships.

Control is a problem because freedom is a thorny issue for most people. Practicing freedom is seldom easy but becomes easier once you see the benefits.

People want to be free and enjoy the idea of being free. We have an innate, built-in longing to be free, not controlled. Freedom was a critical element in the original sin. Adam and Eve were free to choose what was terrible. Satan knew that and encouraged them to exercise their freedom irresponsibly and not be controlled by God. 

Although freedom is part of our DNA, and we long for it, freedom brings fear when you do not understand it. “Will I make the right choices since I am free? Will they make the right choices since (or when) they are free?” People who are good but up to no good believe that others will seldom make the right choice, which requires control to keep them inside the boundaries. That is an energy-draining way to live.

It is your choice to live differently and act more like God, who allows freedom, even for the most reprobate. You damage relationships and create havoc when you fit the "good but up to no good" label.