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What Happened To Us? (Book 4)
Important
Intermediate
Video/Text
Book Series
21 Lessons
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About What Happened To Us? (Book 4)
“I thought when I got married life would be simple and easy.”
“I expected married life to be like walking through a field of sunflowers on a beautiful cool day.”
“My wife was different when we were dating, and I thought she wouldn’t change. Now all she does is nag me about the kids.”
“He just comes home and sits and watches sports. What happened to the man who used to hug me and talk to me about his dreams?”
Do we truly understand relationships and marriage the way God designed them? Or do we bring unrealistic expectations into our relationships? Do we think we can change the other person? What is God's design for relationships? Consider the following scenario and see if any of it resonates with you?
Ready?
What Happened To Us? (Book 4)
God's Design for Relationships
3 Lessons
Important
Here is what Dr. Roy Zuck says in Biblical Theology of the Old Testament. One would naturally expect the Bible, as a historical and theological treatise, to commence its story with creation... If, however, there were theological concerns that transcended creation and its purposes, one could have every right to expect the inspired record to begin with these because the canonical shape is not always exclusively sensitive to chronological concerns. Therefore, the very priority of creation both historiographically and canonically should point to its theological centrality.
Important
Do not miss God’s clear reasoning here for creating woman. She is to be a helper to man. Other versions say the helper will be “suitable,” “meet,” or “as his counterpart.” And, men, God clearly states you need a helper.
Important
Despite the clarity of the different designs and unique roles, people choose to see it differently. That is especially true when the agenda compares men to women to elevate one over the other.
The Image of God in Relationships
4 Lessons
Important
Since God had a specific purpose for mankind on the earth, it makes sense that God would design man and woman to fulfill that purpose. In Genesis chapter 2, God provides insight into the design of men and women. Starting with man, look at the following verses and see the specific reasons God created him.
Important
Why is the design of man so essential to know? Because not knowing or paying attention to the design of something increases the probability of misuse. Consider a time you decided to use a butter knife as a screwdriver. You can make it work, but that is not what it was designed to do. Knowing your design is critical. Otherwise, you do not know if you are using it properly.
Important
And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” – Genesis 2:18 Do you remember that God said it was “not good that man should be alone?” It was God. And do you remember what God wanted for man? “A helper comparable to him.” So, God made exactly what man needed – Woman.
Important
Back to the farming metaphor, women are designed to help, nurture, and support the seed. A woman bears, births, assists, aids, and gives relief to what was planted. Like a man, a woman does not do this alone because she is the complimentary companion to help the man and his aloneness, which men often unrecognize. Finally, a woman’s design is best utilized combined with a man’s design, joining in complementary oneness.
Our Relationships with God
3 Lessons
Important
Are your temptations any different? Satan tempted and deceived Eve to question and doubt God's simple, clear, stated truth. When you question God, you are setting yourself up for deception. Are you questioning God and being deceived?
Important
What about the day-by-day and sometimes moment-by-moment stuff I'm simply trying to get through? How does faith or salvation apply to that?
Important
When you grasp the underlying foundation of the image of God, designs, and judgments, relationships between men and women will stop looking like some of Albert Einstein’s abstract math equations. And, understanding the links between the judgments, designs, and self-absorption (flashing your “ME”), you gain new insight into your behavior and those things that help and hurt marriages.
God's Designs for Men and Women
2 Lessons
Important
Work Is Good & From God - God INITIATED Work (Genesis 1:1) - God INTENDS for Man to work (Genesis 2:8) - God INVENTED Man to Work (Genesis 2:15) - God INVENTED Man’s Work - God INSTRUCTS Man’s Work (I Cor. 10:31, Proverbs 21:30) - God belongs at the INCEPTION of Man’s Work (Matt 6:33, Prov. 16:9, Prov. 21:21)
Important
If you use an agriculture metaphor, God designed women to help, nurture, and support the seed. A woman bears, births, assists, aids, and gives relief to the seed. Like a man, a woman does not do this alone because she is the complementary companion to help the man and his aloneness, which he often does not recognize. Notably, a woman’s design is best utilized in combination with a man’s design, joining in complementary oneness.
The Roles He Created Work Together
9 Lessons
Important
Submission is a component of all relationships. Of course, the easiest one to apply is marriage. Used correctly, it provides the order for the marriage and establishes harmony between the husband and wife. But mutual submission works beyond marriage. When you look at Ephesians 5:21 through 6:9, Paul covers marriage, family, and work.
Important
We do not typically think about submission in the Godhead. It’s easy for us to think about God's power. But there is a tremendous element of both components of order and harmony being demonstrated to us about submission in the Godhead.
Important
We covered mutual submission. Now, this part of submission is about the order. So authority in submission in marriage is about the order. We discussed the order in the Godhead, but God also wants order in the marriage.
Important
Authority is constantly misused, creating an image of harshness or abuse. It is also misused when seen as a person, meaning the person in charge. Finally, it is misused when the person with authority minimizes everyone’s freedom except their own.
Important
There is a big difference in how the world views authority and how God sees it. The world’s view of authority has its roots rigidly attached to ME, pride, my position, and my power.
Important
When you accept your role as the channel of authority, you can focus on valuing and developing people instead of using your authority to control people. How then do you develop people?
Important
God asks leaders to use His authority correctly by freeing people and being gentle. Doing those two things will result in leading correctly.
Important
More passages support the idea that Paul did not try to control the Corinthians. Instead, he invited them to consider the truth.
Important
Finally, here is a summary of Paul’s leadership style as shown in 2 Corinthians 11. I challenge you to study it further to see how his style fits Jesus.