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Divine Judgments
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The judgment of woman has a specific theme and pain created for her because of Eve's sin in the Garden of Eden. And, man is a part of and plays a distinct role in the woman's judgment, which is very evident in daily life. God's judgment of a woman is very different from a man's because of the differences in how men and women are designed. While the judgments may not be unknown, they are mostly ignored. Every woman and man that has, is, and will live - is subject to the judgments issued by God.
Understanding these judgments is like unlocking the secrets of what drives and motivates bad relationships and marriages. As you begin to grasp these all-compassing, profound judgments, you will see them operating in your life in a real way. Knowing the judgments is most of what you need to identify the difficulties and issues in relationships.
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Remember the context of the judgment for women? The serpent had a conversation with Eve, then… “…the woman saw that the tree was good for food, that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree desirable to make one wise, she took the fruit and ate. She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate.” – Genesis 3:6.
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To the woman He said: “I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children; your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” – Genesis 3:16. The theme reveals itself through the three critical elements of the judgment. The first two phrases are about children, and the next two are about the husband. With only that little clue of information, can you see the theme?
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Children not obeying, not honoring you, not listening to you, not caring for you – not relating to you as you would desire of them, is clearly painful. Unfortunately, that “pain” is throughout the child's life. Of course, it does not mean every minute of the relationship is painful. But it does mean the relationship you desire with your children will not be fulfilling unless you live in your design and do as God invites you to.
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The judgment moves from the children to the husband. “…your desire shall be for your husband…” – Genesis 3:16b. And this is where many dialogues, discussions, and arguments have occurred as people try to identify what God is telling women here. Two interpretations tend to be produced:
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The first interpretation can be supported by the intense feelings that a woman can have to enjoy a relationship with a man, especially her husband. She is wired to be relational, and it makes sense that she could be consumed with that desire, which could make life miserable when the husband is not responding.
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The second interpretation can be more easily supported when the word for “desire” in Hebrew (tsuka) is stated as coming from the Aramaic root that means “to compel, to urge, to seek control”. Additionally, when you look for other occurrences of “tsuka” it shows up in the next chapter of Genesis in verse 7 when God was talking with Cain about his anger for the Lord not respecting his offering: “If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it.” – Genesis 4:7 The way “desire” used there is similar to the picture of a predator stalking its prey – ready to pounce. That, of course, is the same picture that God gives us about how Satan roams around like “…a roaring lion…” (1 Peter 5:8).
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Since the same word is used in 4:7 that is used in 3:16, in the same grammatical structure and the same form and context, this second interpretation looks pretty plausible.
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Either interpretation leads to CONTROL. The woman is unwilling to follow or be under the husband's authority. Stated another way – A woman living in her judgment wants to be independent of her husband’s authority. The conclusion of either interpretation, taken to its logical conclusion, is not pretty. Why? IT’S PART OF A JUDGMENT – and it is the consequence of not listening to the Lord. Every woman suffers from this judgment – all of it – all of the time – UNLESS you do as God has shown you in His Word.
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Pain with the children, discord with the husband – can it get worse? Yes, because the last element of the judgment provides some additional news on how your husband will relate to you. “…and he shall rule over you.” – Genesis 3:16c.
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If you are controlling by being dominant, you will see examples like these: - “Turning up the volume” to get him to hear you - Complaining about what he does, says, feels – not just in your thoughts, but out loud to those around you, even with him present - Overriding or trying to override his decisions, telling him how dumb they are - Nagging
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Men “ruling” most often leads to abdicating leadership in the home, multiplied by the control a woman exhibits because of her judgment. Of course, control (manipulation or domination) encourages, even demands, rebellion from anyone, especially the husband. So, he lives in his judgment even more by acting out toward her or getting away from her by focusing on work or activities.
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The Judgment is REALITY. You may not like it, but this is the “way that it IS,” not just how it feels. Not wanting it to be this way is a typical method of trying to remove the pain, but it does not work – IT IS THIS WAY, and IT DOES NOT FEEL GOOD!
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