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07A - The SOLUTION for Great Relationships
Critical
Easy
Video
The SOLUTION
9 Lessons
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About 07A - The SOLUTION for Great Relationships
The SOLUTION to a superior relationship is very clear and straightforward. Still, it is not something that appeals to you unless you have the power of the life of Christ and the energy of the Holy Spirit. When you practice the solution, it makes decisions about relationships extremely simple. Without the SOLUTION in your life, God says that you are nothing!
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07A - The SOLUTION for Great Relationships
Critical
What is your definition of a great relationship? Take a minute or two and write down your definition of a great relationship. Now that you have written your definition, list by name at least three relationships you have that you consider adequate and three that you consider inadequate. For these purposes, adequate means the relationship meets the definition you wrote, while inadequate means it does not.
Critical
Great relationships are probable when both parties have a similar, trustworthy, and valid definition of a great relationship. They must also consistently practice this definition. Robert Fritz states that the math of relationships is, "It takes two to say yes, and one to say no." When both parties say “yes,” there is an excellent chance for a great relationship, but if one person says “no,” there is little chance for a great relationship.
Critical
When leading a group or working with a couple, I often ask the group to pair up with another person, preferably their spouse or special relationship. Then I ask them to look at each other, extend their arm toward the other person, and point their index finger at each other.
Critical
When you point your finger at others, it can be a hypocritical and self-righteous condemnation of the other person instead of an accurate appraisal of a person’s character based on their conduct.
Critical
Since the tendency is to direct your energy into trying to change others, particularly your closest friends and relatives, try another exercise. This will help you move in a direction away from being judgmental.
Critical
Proper definitions are critical. If you desire to practice the quote above, the word that most likely will be difficult for you to define is “love.” And when you say you “love” someone, what are you saying?
Critical
Generally, the world’s “love” is selfish, conditional, and temporary. It promotes flashing your ME, pursuing your good above the good of others. It is unkind because it gets from others more than gives. This love wants to control others.
Critical
The critical difference between real love and the world’s love is the word “decision.” Love is a decision to which your feelings respond. Love exists beyond attraction and requires a decision to pursue their best, their highest good; patiently, kindly, sacrificially, and unconditionally.
Critical
Read your original description of a great relationship. How much would it change if you used the working definition of love? How much would it change if it required nothing from the other person?